I’ve gone plaid. Somehow, I’ve piled up so much on my plate and pushed and pushed and pushed ahead until I passed it all. I’m confused; lost. My ears are buzzing. My eyes feel like I have permanently glued googly eyes to them, and my head feels like it can’t quite contain everything in it. Today, especially, I’m feeling more than a little drained. I’ve gone plaid, and I need to figure out how to get back to present. To my time. To precious time. Have you ever had this feeling?

Starting our little blog has been like a creative explosion in my head.  Suddenly it did exactly what it was supposed to do.  It made me feel like I had a responsibility to complete some things.  Awesome! It made me sit down and plan out and think through these things. Cool!  It made me start thinking about more things. Hmmm…this could be trouble.  And then, it got me motivated and made me start on all of these things. All. At. Once.  Eeek!  Yep. Chaos.  Totally not my fault, after all I’m the procrastinator, right?  I wouldn’t do that on my own.  Um, correction, I’m the dreamonator…I sooo would do that.

And there you have it.  I have a couple of areas in my home that are now torn apart as I begin their makeovers.  I have several Hobby Lobby bags lying around my desk filled with components for smaller projects.  I have moments where a seriously cool idea will pop into my head and I just have to write it down or get something out (to pile on my desk) so that I will remember to add that project to the list too.  Oh, but I also have “busy season” at my grown up job, three sweet little P’s that call me momma and need me almost every second that I am not sleeping, and one hubby that can only be distracted by football for so long.  So, I’ve started cramming my days with even more busy-ness…but it’s been really exciting.  I don’t relax or watch TV or write in the evenings like I used to.  Scratch that, I guess I’m “writing” right now.  I’m feeling creative and accomplished and… really, really tired.  What is up?  Did I have another sweet pea?  Nope, duh (!), I had a blog.

Who knew a blog that was created to help motivate and inspire me would actually help motivate and inspire me?  Not me.  Obviously.  Wow.  Really, is it too early to shout success?  I think so, but I’m learning!  I’m doing!  I think it’s really cool because this whole project – the blog and all the projects that came with it – are teaching me and helping me to accomplish so much more than I really planned on it doing.  I haven’t given myself much down time since starting this though.  I’ve been planning and searching and, frankly, there just isn’t that much normal time in the present.

Stay with me here, but I’ve come to realize there must be different dimensions of time in this world.  I know there are 24 hours in present day time.  That’s scientific, I get it.  Yet, I also know that I can get on Pinterest for 5 minutes and when I log off again it’s been an hour.  Okay, so 1 hour present day time = 5 minutes Pinterest time…good to know.  I’m discovering this in many areas of my day.

One of those areas I just discovered tonight. Precious time. It works similar to present time, but if you’re not careful you can miss it and it’s a very valuable time. The most valuable. I was lying in my daughter’s bed, cuddling Scooby Doo, holding her hand, and waiting for her to get sleepy enough for me to kiss her head and see her off to sweet dreams.  Many times I fall asleep during this time too and slip into the close your eyes for 5 seconds time = “Whoa, I was asleep for 30 minutes?!” time – watch out for that one, it’s one of those trickier time dimensions.  Tonight, though, I was abuzz with stuff to do and new ideas desperately trying to seep out like little beads of sweat on my forehead.  If I were to sweat, but since I’m always cold that doesn’t really happen, and that’s another story altogether.  I digress.  So, I was anxiously waiting for her to stop kicking me, and the bed, and anything else she could find to put her little feet on to prove to me that she was, in fact, still crazy-wide-eyed awake and I was not permitted to leave.  Not without her at least.  I was even, almost, irritated because I was wasting time just lying in a dark room.  Doing nothing.  Accomplishing nothing.  Knowing there was so very much I needed to do downstairs.  And not just what I wanted to do, but stuff I needed to do.  For work, for school tomorrow, for us to have plates to eat on tomorrow morning…you get the point.

Then it hit me. Spaceballs is, and always will be, one of my favorite movies.  I haven’t watched it in years but I quote it all the time.  If you are not familiar, there is a moment where people are trying so hard to catch up that they go beyond now and into plaid.  I believe they used ludicrous speed to get there.  “Ludicrous speed – GO!”

Oh yeah, pretty sure that’s what I did.  Way past hyperdrive.

I had gone plaid.

That explains it!!  I was working in plaid time.  Pushing, pushing forward for what is next without soaking in the present.  Just get it done and move on.  But that’s no fun.  What a waste of time!  Precious time.  I want to accomplish my goals and finish my projects, but I want to accomplish them.  Revel in them.  Enjoy them.  Somewhat selfish I suppose, but so much time is spent doing things just because they need done – they’re on the list, check it off.  I want to fully experience the satisfaction of completing things I’ve set my mind to, because, honestly, I don’t often do that.  I’d really like it if I could stay in present time when I do them too, because that’s where everyone around me seems to be, and I don’t want to miss them in the process.  I’d also like to use these projects and processes as a teaching/learning tool for myself, my kids, and anyone else – and that is really hard to do at ludicrous speed with time flashing by.

I’m wild about my peas.  There are so many of them in my life and they all need time, quality time. Especially my most precious little sweet peas.  So, I decided, I don’t care about what “needs” done.  Almost certain the world won’t end if some of those things wait just a little longer.  Yes, likely the procrastinator in me coming out, but, this time, I can justify it.  I figured, right now, this is important too and I’m going to clear my mind. Empty the buzz.

I took a breath, relaxed, listened…and loved what I heard: beautiful music. I heard my daughter’s previously agitating feet making music; making rhythm.  It occurred to me how musical she is. She sings, she dances, she makes up songs…she even plays beats with her feet when trying to ward off sleep. It made me smile. Life is musical.  It can carry you and release you, but you can’t try to control it.  You have to let it take you.  My daughter can let go of whatever else is going on if, at that moment, a great melody is in her head. Music makes her happy and moves her.  She is so much like me…yet I had the music on mute in plaid time.  Hmmm, maybe there’s a reason I’m the dreamonator after all.  =)

Light bulb!!  Problem solved. Must – leave – plaid – time— behind.

And, just like that, I did. And, just like that, she fell asleep. Interesting. Amazing. A calm was in the room. Music was in the room.  I was so inspired…and… I was free to go.  I was free to go downstairs and stay up all night working. But I didn’t. I stayed and cuddled for a bit – enjoying some precious time that goes by way too fast. And learning. All because of a Pea.

Tomorrow, I’m going to crank up the music and try to remember to work in precious time from now on. It will be hard. Especially when Pinterest time pops up. That very dangerous and lovely Pinterest time. I’m going to try it though.

Because, for me, it all started with a pea.  And tonight, P is for precious time.

Good night all. “Smoke if you got ’em”*

*Special Note* I’m in no way endorsing smoking, in fact I dislike it very much. I do, however, love that part in Spaceballs the Movie.